How To Track Down an Old Flame

If you’ve still got connections to your flame’s friends or family, drop a respectful letter or make a polite phone call. You never know — they may just be willing to help you out.

Go to Google to start your online research. Did you know you can guarantee a word will be included in your search results if you put a plus sign in front of it? Review Google’s advanced search tips to optimize how you target your information.

You’re probably already looking for your old flame on social- and business-networking sites like MySpace, Friendster, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, and ZoomInfo. Search multiple sites at the same time by using an uber-search engine like wink.com.

Do you know the name of your long lost love’s high school or college? Use a school-themed social-networking site like classmates.com or reunion.com.

Most search engines won’t automatically look through databases and private sites, also known as the “invisible” or “deep” web. To access these deeper results, try searching with the keyword “database,” or using a site like pipl.com, which automatically combs the invisible web.

If special someone is proving to be untraceable, try zabasearch.com, an unbelievably thorough people finder that accesses listings for current and former addresses and phone numbers.

Firefox offers a free add-on called “Who Is This Person?” Download the extension and highlight any name on a webpage. The program allows you to search that name on sites like Technorati, Yahoo, and Wikipedia.

If you keep hitting dead ends, consider hiring a private detective. Get recommendations, and make sure the PI is licensed, bonded, insured, experienced, and discreet. Also, be prepared to fork over a wad of cash.

You’ve finally got the contact info! Now what? Writing an email or note gives you the time to plan out what you’d like to say, and has much less potential for disaster than an out-of-the-blue phone call.