How To Plot the Most Humiliating Sports Bet Ever

  • January 15, 2009
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The scenario: The Super Bowl. The stakes: Humiliation. The results: Incredibly satisfying.

You Will Need

  • Someone to bet against
  • Your team’s jersey
  • Face paint
  • Coasters
  • A razor
  • A poker game
  • A bikini wax (optional)
How To Plot the Most Humiliating Sports Bet Ever: Make them convert

Step 1: Make them convert

Make them wear the winning team’s jersey for a full day—preferably the one representing their most despised player—with their face painted in the team colors. At a sports bar that night, they’ll have to go up to at least 20 strangers and say, “Is this team the greatest, or what?”

To ratchet up the humiliation, force them to visit their favorite sports bar in their new garb—the regulars will be shocked at the defection.

How To Plot the Most Humiliating Sports Bet Ever: Spread the word

Step 2: Spread the word

For two weeks after the big game, make the loser admit their folly every time they meet someone new. After they introduce themselves, they must add that they bet on the losing team.

How To Plot the Most Humiliating Sports Bet Ever: Make coasters

Step 3: Make coasters

Get coasters made featuring a photo of the loser in the winning team’s jersey. Stipulate that they have to use them anytime you’re over.

How To Plot the Most Humiliating Sports Bet Ever: Shave them

Step 4: Shave them

Shave their eyebrows. In their place, write the winning team’s city above one eye, and the team name over the other.

How To Plot the Most Humiliating Sports Bet Ever: Go to the videotape!

Step 5: Go to the videotape!

Have the loser post a video of themselves on the web singing an original ballad about the winning team. Send the link to as many friends as possible.

How To Plot the Most Humiliating Sports Bet Ever: Play strip poker

Step 6: Play strip poker

Organize a poker game with male and female players—with the loser decked in the winning team’s colors. Conveniently, they’ll be the only one playing strip poker, shedding clothes to reveal team slogans. Want to add injury to insult? If the loser is a guy, get him groomed beforehand—with a bikini wax.

An estimated $7 billion is wagered on the Super Bowl every year.

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Comments (3)

Pip_Vatel

Great photography!!

over 3 years ago by Pip_Vatel

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BCipolla

This has given me so many dastardly ideas.

over 3 years ago by BCipolla

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Mitch_Khumsteen

this is neat

over 3 years ago by Mitch_Khumsteen

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