How To Get Out Of Gym Class
- February 18, 2009
- 7,676 Views
Writer
chatel8
Music
Edison Music Corp
Voice Over Artist
Darcie Champagne
Not in the mood to do jumping jacks in your hideous gym uniform? There are ways to sit it out.
You Will Need
- Creativity
- A straight face
Step 1: “Forget” your gym clothes
Tell the teacher you left your gym clothes at home, and pray some suck-up in the class doesn’t offer you a spare.
Step 2: Fake a sprain
Fake an ankle sprain. After all, if you can’t walk, you can’t run, and you certainly can’t play dodge ball. Limp into gym class with a tall tale about how you just twisted your ankle in the stairwell.
Make sure you’re consistent with your limping — you don’t want to be caught dragging your right leg after you’ve been hobbling with your left. A bandage will help you remember exactly where you’re hurting.
Step 3: Feign a stomach flu
First, dust your face with white powder so you look ghostly pale. Then, ask to speak to the gym teacher. Get right in her face, fake some dry heaves, and run for the bathroom. Trust us, no one will go looking for you.
Step 4: Claim “female problems”
Sorry boys, this one only works for those with uteruses: Tell your instructor that you have unbearable cramps, or better still, a heavy flow. Be graphic about how many tampons you’ve gone through, and continue adding gross details until she begs you to go.
If you have a female gym teacher, she may give you some bunk about how exercise is good for you during your period. Respond by doubling over in pain from your debilitating cramps.
Step 5: Stay home
The foolproof way of getting out of gym class? Stay home “sick” that day and avoid all your classes.
Only 17 percent of middle schools and two percent of high schools require daily gym classes for their students.
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Comments (2)
Hahahah! What a fun spot!
over 2 years ago by HeatherM
good tips i used one. step two!
about 1 year ago by sowhatviola
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