How To Escape From a Bad Party Without Offending the Host

As soon as you arrive, ditch your coat, grab a drink, and head for the host. Note how charming the bathroom décor is or how tasty the appetizers are to pretend you’ve been at the party for a while instead of having just walked in the door.

After talking to your host, make the rounds. You want the host to notice you at different points in different places. It will create the impression that you’re having a lovely time, and register that you were there… more than you were really there.

A few minutes before you ditch, sidle up next to the host and announce something that makes it seem you were there longer than you really were—like, “I’m gonna have to make this my last drink!” (even if it’s your first) and “This is my third trip to the buffet!”

When you’re ready to make a break for it, discreetly gather your belongings and pause at the door. Wait until the host seems engaged in conversation, then catch her eye, point at your watch apologetically, and mouth “Thank you!” Give her a devastated and conflicted look as if you can’t believe you have to leave so soon… then bolt.

If your host breaks away from conversation to say goodbye face-to-face, try not to offer any reason for your early departure other than the aforementioned prior commitment, since lies have a tendency to trip you up later. Deflect her attention by lavishing her with compliments about the party.

Send a thank-you note after the party. Not only is this good manners, but it will help alleviate any resentment your host may harbor about your early departure.