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The trick to helping your better, albeit unemployed, half? Motivate them without nagging.

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  Step 1: Decide if you need to get tough

  Decide if you need to get tough. It’s normal for you to feel resentment, especially if they have been out of work for a while. The trick is to determine if you’re angry at the situation, or if you are justifiably annoyed because they are not doing enough to find a job. If it’s the latter, let them know it’s time to step up their game.

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  Step 2: Identify the problem

  If your spouse is not getting many interviews, take a look at their resume. You may be able to beef it up by identifying strengths and skills they don’t know they have. If they are getting plenty of interviews but no job offers, stage some mock interviews with them to see if you can pinpoint what they’re doing wrong in the hot seat.

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  Step 3: Help them network

  Encourage them to call anybody and everybody they can think of who might have a job lead, and you do the same with your network of friends, family, and business associates.

• Tip

  Social-networking sites are a great way to reconnect with old friends and classmates.

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  Step 4: Encourage them to join groups

  Urge them to join professional associations and to find a job seekers group through your house of worship or community center. Besides widening their list of contacts, it will help combat the isolation that many unemployed workers feel.

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  Step 5: Consider temp work

  Suggest they take on some temp work. It’s a good way to stay busy, earn some money, make new contacts, and perhaps even land a full-time gig. Plus, it will take some pressure off your relationship if they’re once again contributing to the family coffers.

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  Step 6: Be patient

  Be patient. It takes about six months to find a new job, so try not to get discouraged if the search at times seems fruitless.

• Fact

  The average American has 10 jobs in their lifetime.