How To Fight Off a Vampire
- October 9, 2008
- 16,043 Views
Writer
Rosemarie_Lennon
Music
Todd Mazierski
Voice Over Artist
Darcie Champagne
You never know when you’ll have to defend yourself against one of these bloodsuckers, so be prepared to bring a vampire to his knees.
You Will Need
- Garlic
- A cross
- Rice, grain, or seeds
- Lots of holy water
- A stake made of ash, oak, or cedar
- An ax
- Matches
- Some water
- A nail
- Some vinegar
Step 1: Wear garlic
Discourage the undead from wanting to bite you in the first place by wearing garlic around your neck; the pungent bulb is thought to repel vampires because it deters their blood-sucking cousins, mosquitoes.
Step 2: Throw seeds
If a vampire is approaching you, spill a bag of millet, seed, or rice in front of it. According to both Eastern European folklore and Chinese mythology, it will be unable to resist counting each and every grain, giving you time to escape.
Step 3: Head for daylight
If possible, expose the vampire to the sun; maneuvering it into sunlight is a sure way to finish it off.
Step 4: Toss holy water
Toss holy water at it. The challenge here is that you need a lot — a few sprinkles won’t do it.
Step 5: Drive a stake
Time to come in for the kill. Take a stake made of ash, oak, or cedar and drive it straight through the vampire’s heart and into something that will pin it — like the wall, the floor, or its coffin.
In Macedonia, they forego the stake and just drive a nail through the vampire’s navel.
Step 6: Cut off its head
Once you have the vampire pinned, take an ax and chop off its head.
Boil the head in vinegar; that’s they way they finish off the undead in Crete.
Step 7: Incinerate it
Once it’s decapitated, make a big fire and toss both the head and body into it. Poke them around until they’re reduced to a pile of ashes.
Step 8: Dispose of the ashes
Throw the ashes into some water and rest easy, knowing the undead is undone.
In modern-day Romania, vampire killing — that is, digging up a dead relative believed to be one of the undead, cutting out their heart, burning it to ashes, and drinking those ashes mixed with water — is illegal but still practiced.
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Comments (12)
silver bullet is a werewolf, not a vampire.
over 3 years ago by widget
kiddin' :(
over 3 years ago by muxadox
Thanksforthetips....:)
over 3 years ago by digicam1962
now i know
over 3 years ago by pokefan
That won't work on edward!!!!
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3 months ago by lslaa288
Haha,I do not believe there will be a vampire,if really have,I will throw fire to it.
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5 months ago by Pamela123_
The fact isn't real.
I'm from Romania and that's an insult.
Ne-ati insultat poporul nostru cu aceasta minciuna!!!
over 2 years ago by raduradu
The fact isn't real.
I'm from Romania and that's an insult.
Ne-ati insultat poporul nostru cu aceasta minciuna!!!
over 2 years ago by raduradu
that would never kill the cullens
over 2 years ago by nikkipie
vampire is fake
over 3 years ago by loveall10
there is a true story about a vampire. but it proves most of the propaganda about them is fake (ie garlic and crosses) which is why this video is useless. and besides, who would be willing to carry that with them everywhere? AND they barely do any damage to you just leave you with a bruise you probably wont find anyway.
over 3 years ago by smashbrawl
You forgot the silver bullet.. anyway...
I would just punch the vampire to death.
over 3 years ago by sarge657
Yeah, like the vampires exist... anyway, take the tools and put them next to your bed, in case you met one in your dreams...
over 3 years ago by EvilThunder
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