How To Discuss Your Dating History
- February 15, 2010
- 3,563 Views
Writer
Brandon Potter
Music
The Way It Is
Voice Over Artist
Robyn Ferrari
Actor
Nicholas Calhoun
Actor
Kristin Mularz
You weren’t a hermit before you met your main squeeze. Here’s how to acknowledge your past without hurting anyone’s feelings.
You Will Need
- Self-awareness
- Honesty
- Wit
Step 1: Find a balance
Find a balance. Never mentioning your exes can seem like you’re hiding something, but talking about them constantly indicates you’re still hung up on them.
Step 2: Be honest about contact
Be honest about any current contact you have with your exes. Lying about talking to an ex may seem like a good way out of an awkward conversation, but it could cause serious complications later on.
Step 3: Avoid comparisons
Avoid comparing the present to the past. If your partner asks for a comparison, defuse it with a non-threatening observation
When talking about sex, don’t get specific about other partners. Detailed info could lead to feelings of inadequacy for your partner.
Step 4: Create new associations
Don’t associate places or objects with your ex. Discussing your past may be necessary, but ruining something by talking about how special it was for you and your ex isn’t.
Step 5: Don't linger on heartbreak
When discussing a previous relationship don’t linger on the heartbreak. Talking about how painful the breakup was can give the impression you haven’t moved on.
Step 6: Be positive
Enjoy the closeness of an honest but sensitive relationship. After satisfying their curiosity the smart way, you and your partner will feel more secure than ever!
In a poll, 28 percent of people admitted talking about their exes on a first date.
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