How to Tell Someone Off

If a roommate or co-worker has decided to park on your last nerve, this guide will show you how to regain your freedom and sanity.


Up next in How to Improve Your Communication Skills (68 videos)

Whether you're dealing with friends, family, a lover, or co-workers, you'll benefit from the communication skills taught in this Howcast video series. Among the advice included: how to tell someone off; how to deliver an ultimatum; how to complain; how to solve creative differences; how to give a compliment; how to take criticism; how to apologize; how to read social cues; how to learn to say no; and much more.


You Will Need

  • Focus
  • Calm demeanor
  • Guts


  1. Step 1

    Organize your thoughts

    Organize your thoughts and plan for the confrontation but don't let the transgression go or wait too long.

  2. Step 2

    Go straight to the source

    Go straight to the source and focus on one person or event at a time. Too many could make you seem scatterbrained and inconsistent.

  3. Step 3

    Be brief

    Be brief and don't ramble, get straight to the point, and be as specific as possible without cursing.

  4. Don't be mean or belittle the other person. Keep your class intact.

  5. Step 4

    Offer solutions

    Offer solutions to the problems and ask them nicely instead of just complaining. Don't feel you have to get your way to win.

  6. Step 5

    Describe your emotions

    Describe your emotions and how it feels when the other person does or say something that triggers your anger.

  7. Step 6

    Be respectful

    Be respectful, powerful, and assertive, but don't back down or feel you have to try and be nice. Let everything out to regain your freedom.

  8. Step 7

    Write a letter

    Write a strongly worded letter if all else fails or if the other person has a habit of becoming violent when confronted.

  9. Elephants never forget because their survival instinct recognizes specific animals and people who have hurt them in the past.