How to Fight Pirates
Captain Jack Sparrow may make it look easy in _Pirates of the Caribbean_, but fighting pirates is not for the faint of heart. Here are some high-tech ways to fend them off.
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You Will Need
- Citadel
- Long Range Acoustic Device
- Mobility Denial System
- Force 80 Water Cannon
- Sword skills
- Protective headsets (optional)
Steps
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Step 1
Build a citadel
Create a citadel -- a safe room built into the ship that the crew can barricade themselves in if pirates come on board. It should have mechanisms to control the ship, emergency rations, a safe air supply, surveillance cameras, and external communication equipment. That way, you won't have to fight pirates.
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Step 2
Explode their eardrums
Set off a Long Range Acoustic Device, or LRAD -- a high-powered loudspeaker that launches a verbal assault on pirates when they're still a mile away. That may deter a good percentage, since they depend on the element of surprise. For the rest, set off the LRAD's "deterrent tone" -- a sound so intense that it causes extreme pain to anyone it's being beamed at; it can even cause permanent hearing damage.
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Hand out protective headsets before you set off the LRAD so you don't deafen your own crew!
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Step 3
Slip them up
Deploy the Mobility Denial System -- a slippery, non-toxic foam that makes any surface too slick to walk on. Spray the stuff on your ship and theirs and it will be impossible for them to board your vessel.
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Step 4
Soak them
Shoot off the Force 80 Water Cannon -- a stainless steel, remote-controlled gun that can send 1,400 gallons of water per minute 100 yards in any direction; it will flood the pirates' boat in minutes.
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Install the Force 80 controls inside the ship so the pirates can't shoot the person operating it.
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Step 5
Develop your sword skills
Nothing managed to scare them off? Then you'd better dust off your sword skills -- or prepare to walk the plank.
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There were 445 reported pirate attacks on shipping vessels in 2010, mostly off the coast of Somalia.
