Up next in How to Understand Legal Issues (19 videos)
Stay on the right side of the law, and learn how to navigate the legal system, with these videos.
You Will Need
- Willingness to forego bathing
- Some acting skills
- Offensive clothes
Have a legitimate reason
You may have a legitimate reason and not even know it. If you are over 70 years old, do not understand English, or are the sole caretaker of small children or elderly adults, you will usually be granted a request to be excused.
Forego showers and deodorant
Neither lawyer is going to want to pick you for the jury if you smell like someone whose bodily secretions have been marinating in the heat for several days.
Show up in your dirtiest, rattiest clothes so that your fellow potential jurors are loath to sit near you.
Pick a side
During the 'voir dire' process—when the lawyers interview you to see if you’re impartial—pick a side. If it’s a civil case involving damages, say you’re sick of people getting rich on accidents, noting eloquently that 'shit happens.'
Invoke loved ones in red flag professions
Mention loved ones that suggest you may be biased in this case. In general, defense attorneys don’t want people related to cops, and attorneys handling medical malpractice cases will excuse anyone connected to a doctor.
Show you’re a free thinker
When asked if you could uphold a law that you don’t agree with, say, 'No way.' Add something menacing like, 'In fact, I am the law.' Howl maniacally.