Updated:
Original:

How to Lose Your Virginity

You're going to remember this for the rest of your life, so make sure it's memorable for the right reasons.

Instructions

  • Step 1: Choose a partner Pick the appropriate person to be your partner—you don't want to surrender your precious gift to the first "playa" who smiles your way.
  • TIP: If you're embarrassed by your inexperience, choose another first-timer, so you're on equal footing. If you want to make up for lost time, choose an older partner who's "been there, done that."
  • Step 2: Pick a location Pick a location that will be comfortable and secure for both of you, then make sure it's presentable—nobody likes a skanky love shack.
  • TIP: Things could get messy; place a towel or two in strategic locations so you don't lose any momentum when the action heats up.
  • Step 3: Make yourself presentable Make yourself presentable too—nobody likes a skanky lover, either.
  • Step 4: Wear convenient clothes Wear clothes that come off easily. Once you get the green light, you don't want anything slowing you down.
  • Step 5: Get birth control & condoms Get your birth control in order—make sure you have fresh condoms on hand and anything else you may need.
  • TIP: You may also want to have some lubricant on hand in case first-time jitters leave one of you high and dry.
  • Step 6: Set the mood Set the mood—a little atmosphere goes a long way.
  • Step 7: Welcome partner warmly Welcome your partner warmly; make sure they know they're the most important person in the world to you.
  • TIP: If your partner is nervous, tell a bad joke, perform a stupid trick, do anything to make them laugh. If you're nervous, talk about your fears and reservations with your partner—clear the air with some good old-fashioned honesty.
  • Step 8: Pick your moment Wait until everything's going smoothly and the two of you are really clicking then make your move.
  • TIP: Don't try any funny stuff: no sex toys, no crazy positions. You just got the training wheels off, now's not the time to go burning rubber and popping wheelies.
  • Step 9: Take it on home Now go get 'em, Tiger—it's smooth sailing from here on out.
  • FACT: A recent study found that 26% of people between the ages of 75 and 85 are sexually active.

You Will Need

  • A willing partner
  • A comfortable place
  • A plan
  • Some towels
  • Some lubricants
  • A little self-restraint

Popular Categories