- Step 1: Understand it Understand the problem. Some erectile dysfunction is biological and can be treated by a doctor. Performance anxiety is a psychological pattern that can stem from intimacy issues and low self-esteem. If left unchecked it can worsen self-esteem problems and lead to feelings of rejection in your partner.
- Step 2: Check your health Stick to a healthy lifestyle. Diet and exercise both affect erectile function; plus, if you feel great about the way you look, you're less likely to get jittery before doing the deed.
- TIP: Certain medications such as anti-depressants can impair sex drive as well as arousal.
- Step 3: Talk to your partner Reassure your partner. Explain that your trouble between the sheets is due to anxiety, not loss of interest. Honest communication will ease tension and get you back on track to bedroom bliss.
- Step 4: Relax Enjoy your partner and relish the moment. Obsessing about being "good in bed," or whether or not you and your partner will climax can ruin a sexual experience.
- Step 5: Have fun No intercourse? No problem. Experiment with other techniques to drive each other wild. Not only will this maintain intimacy between you and your partner, it'll also boost your confidence, and add a few new moves to your carnal bag of tricks.
- Step 6: Look into therapy See a therapist to help manage stress so you don't bring it into the bedroom. If you've established a long pattern of performance anxiety, try seeing a sex therapy specialist.
- TIP: Ask your therapist about sensate focus techniques, guided exercises for couples to increase intimacy and reduce tension.
- Step 7: Use medication If the problem persists, talk to a doctor about erectile dysfunction medication. A pattern of performance anxiety can often be broken with a temporary prescription that'll help you get your groove back.
- FACT: More than 40 percent of U.S. women also experience sexual dysfunction, including performance anxiety.
You Will Need
- Healthy lifestyle
- Understanding partner
- Adventurous attitude
- Medical doctor