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How to Overcome Shyness

Are you tired of getting sweaty palms and butterflies in your stomach in social situations? Use this guide to say sayonara to shyness.


  • Step 1: Gain confidence Assess your positive qualities to boost self-confidence. Whether at work or school, in crowded parties or in the bedroom, knowing your strengths helps you keep a positive attitude.
  • TIP: Listen to motivational lectures to foster self-assurance.
  • Step 2: Imagine talking to a person Imagine confidently talking to another person, practicing what you might say as the star of a social gathering to teach yourself new ways of how to relate to guys and girls.
  • Step 3: Face your demons Face the demons underlying your shyness and explore the fears keeping you from expressing your true personality and interacting positively with others. Examine what situations make you most uncomfortable and consider why.
  • Step 4: Master risk taking Master risk taking beginning with small social exchanges and gradually build the confidence to ask someone on a date, or make a public speech.
  • TIP: Set and accomplish small goals on a regular basis to build a positive demeanor.
  • Step 5: Consider others Consider that others may feel equally shy, so make it easy for them to engage in conversation, focusing on how listening, rather than speaking, helps both you and your conversational partner overcome shyness.
  • Step 6: Seek professional guidance If you are unable to conquer shyness on your own, seek professional guidance to lead you through the process. A pro can recommend books and other resources, as well as help you recognize progress in overcoming the behaviors keeping you from becoming all you are.
  • FACT: About 40 percent of the population of the United States reports shyness.

You Will Need

  • Strategy
  • Courage
  • Consideration
  • Professional guidance
  • Motivational lectures (optional)
  • Small goals (optional)

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