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How to Write Your Own Wedding Vows

A great way to personalize your ceremony is to pen your own vows. These tips will make it easy.


  • Step 1: Check with the officiant Make sure the person performing your ceremony is OK with you writing your own wedding vows. Some officiants may require you to incorporate some of the more traditional language into your personalized vows.
  • Step 2: Describe your love Jot down what you love about your spouse-to-be. Think in terms of anecdotes, not adjectives, for a more vivid description. Avoid cliches like saying your spouse-to-be is your "best friend" or your "soul mate."
  • TIP: Steer clear of sample vows, even for inspiration; the whole point of writing your own wedding vows is to make them original.
  • Step 3: Go down memory lane Reflect on the most memorable events in your relationship, like the moment you realized that your fiance was The One, or a time they really came through for you. Include lighthearted memories too, like a shared experience that always makes you both laugh.
  • Step 4: Make some promises Think of a couple of promises you'd like to make to your new mate. Be specific, and feel free to balance a serious vow with a lighthearted one.
  • Step 5: Pull it all together Pull it all together in a spiel that takes no longer than a minute to recite. Read it to someone you trust to get their opinion.
  • TIP: Don't practice your vows too much; you want to sound natural, not rehearsed.
  • Step 6: Have them framed Have your wedding vows framed and hang them in your home as a reminder of the promises you made to each other.
  • FACT: When Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston wed in 2000, he promised to "split the difference on the thermostat." They divorced in 2005.

You Will Need

  • Permission
  • Memories
  • Promises

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