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How to Have Stronger Erections

Learn how to have stronger erections from sex therapist Dr. Megan Fleming in this Howcast video about the psychology of sex.


So the first thing I want you to know if you're looking to have a stronger, firm erection is to think about what turns you on. Because in order to have your most optimal arousal response, you have to be the most turned you can be.

And arousal is both physical and psychological. So what are your mental turn-ons? You know,what does it that your partner does that just drives you crazy or maybe it's some mental imagery, fantasy, erotica. Many different things to choose from. And also to notice, what are your physical turn-ons and turn-offs? So that ultimately you're getting speed, the pressure, perhaps the preferred sexual position, that helps you to have the most intense arousal

Some couples also like to experiment a little bit with adding additional stimulation. So it could be the novelty of a new experience or position or perhaps trying out sexual toys, which could include the use of a vibrator, may include anal play and also perhaps the use of a constrictive device at the base of your penis. The options are somewhat endless that you can both explore and play to focus on what ultimately gets you the most aroused.

It's also true that for some men, when you start to notice a little less firmness in your erections, it may be the beginnings of erectile dysfunction. And by that I mean, perhaps there's something organic going on. Whether you might have some blood flow difficulties or most commonly it's anxiety, or what I call intrusive thinking. Because as soon as you notice that you're not as firm or as hard as you once were, that's what we call a very intrusive thought and it completely can highjack your sexual experience and your arousal. So look for the awareness of, I consider it like a cartoon bubble above your head and the dialog box in it and notice whether or not the thoughts in there are sexy and turning you on or what I call anti-fantasy. And it will ensure that you are going to have certainly a less than an optimal experience.

There are many things to consider but ultimately you're on the right track. Just focus on what turns you on and make sure that you both make time in your experience so that you can try on lots of different things and that's going to lead to your most optimal experience.

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