Touching's a really easy way to determine if someone's attracted to you or not. Now, a lot of books will say if someone touches you they like you. Not the case. Some people just touch a lot. All right. So you've got to be careful. Some women just are touchers. They like to touch. They like the way they touch you. Some men just touch a lot. It's just a way of communicating socially or the way they were raised. It doesn't matter. So you want to pay attention to that.
If a person touches you but touches all your friends, it doesn't mean they like you. It means they probably just touch a lot. If a person never touches anybody, and then all of a sudden touches you, that could mean something interesting. All right. So you're looking for deviations in how people touch you.
Now there's a couple other things. A useful thing to do actually to figure out those deviations in baseline is to just kind of see or observe someone for ten minutes and see how often they touch someone. If in ten minutes they don't touch anybody or they don't touch any of the people they are interacting with, but in the ten minutes that you interact with them they touch you four or five times, that tends to be a good sign, because it's a sharp deviation in how they normally act. Okay?
You're also going to take into consideration how they touch you. You know, and I'll make the argument that deviations in baseline that deal with touching are good regardless of how they touch you. Now, there's touching that's very good. So one of the things you'll tend to see is right before two people kiss, you'll tend to see touching usually initiated by the woman somewhere between the waist and the shoulders. So a lot of women go for the buttons. They'll touch the buttons, or they'll touch somewhere on the hand. And it's kind of like, touch is a very intimate sort of thing, especially in attraction.
So we live in a society, I know especially in New York City, where we don't like to essentially be touched, which is very interesting. Because like in New York City if you touch somebody, it's alarming. But down South, I'll never forget when I was in New Orleans everybody was touching. I was like, "What the hell is going on? Why is everybody so touchy?" But it's the social context there. So touching is not, so certain women from the Midwest might touch a lot more than women from New York City. That's why you need to really pay attention to the deviation in baseline. Some people are just, that's how they communicate. They touch.
And touching's a very important way. And, you know, it builds rapport. It opens you up, so on and so forth. But you've got to make sure that the person touching you actually doesn't touch other people, or else you're just like everybody else.