Garcia: This is your old barrio, right Johnson? Then you can be my tour guide.
Johnson: Me? But I quit the whole demon thing ages ago, and really my memory is absolutely rubbish.
Garcia: Oh,I'm sure it will come back to you in no time. Relax, amigo. This is going to be an adventure. Our very own road movie. And the best part is you never know what's waiting around the bend.
Johnson: Like what you see?
Garcia: Que magnifico! Where is Fleming's castle?
Johnson: Well, it won't be on this side of the door.
Garcia: All right. Let's start this road movie with some road kill!
Johnson: That's right, G. Don't let all that peace and quiet push you around.
Garcia: When demons hear the name "Garcia Fucking Hotspur". They run the other way! Johnson what the hell is that thing?
Johnson: Holy cow! I don't believe it .Willy!That's one-eyed William!
Garcia: Friend of yours?
Johnson: Are you kidding? William is my aunt's first husband's adopted son from the Ukraine!
Garcia: Then you are practically brothers. I can't see shit up ahead.
Johnson: The underworld be a shadowy place. Anyway, not a problem. Take a look over there. You see that lamp?
Garcia: Hanging on the wall?
Johnson: I can light that up for you.
Garcia: The Lightshot, of course.
Johnson: Give it a try G. There did I brighten your day?
Garcia: What can I say Johnson?You are the right tool for every job. So when do I get to light up some demons?
Johnson: I'm sure you'll have your chance. They hate my Lightshot. Leaves a nasty rash. Ka-ching! Save up those white gems, G.
Garcia: These demons aren't very talkative.
Johnson: What do they go to talk about? Once your soul rolls into town, that's it. You're damned and Flaming doesn't let anybody off the hook.
Garcia: He sounds like a real dick-tator. Johnson why is there a goat head hanging on the wall?
Johnson: Oh, well, everybody knows that goats are a source of light.
Garcia: Right, of course.
Johnson: Poor tyke. Most new arrivals in the Underworld are condemned to guard doors like this for the first hundred years. We all have to start somewhere.
Garcia: Paula? Come back! Paula!
Johnson: Easy G, this place is full of deceptions and dirty tricks.
Garcia: Is that a floating . . .
Johnson: Strawberry! Oh, give me. Oh, these things are like demon catnip. When I was little....
Garcia: Jonson do I take this strawberry?
Johnson: Yes! Geez, excuse me for having a little fruit fantasy. Hey, don't you dare give my strawberry to that sprog on the door! No! G, you berry squanderer. Ah, drinks. At least there's one good thing about the Underworld.
Garcia: What? Liver damage.
Johnson: That's the beauty of it. In the underworld you don't die from drinks. They un-kill people here.
Garcia: Paula? Paula? [Foreign language 0:06:38]
Johnson: Uh oh, I was afraid of this.
Garcia: What? Why is it suddenly getting dark?
Johnson: This isn't ordinary darkness. If you stay in it too long it'll suck the life out of you. Quick use the Lightshot on the goat head.