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How to Flirt with Girls

Learn how to flirt with girls in this online flirting lesson from Howcast.

Transcript

Speaker 1: So, so many guys ask you, how well, how do you flirt? How do you know, what is interesting about it? How do you get it going and doing? And it sounds like it's such a simple question, but obviously it's layered with some many nuances.

The first thing is every girl since puberty, every guy that has come up and spoken to her has basically thought about getting her naked. They're so used to this that that drives them crazy. They can see it from a mile away.

So, the biggest thing to do, at least at the beginning is to come in without the intent to get something out of it to the intent to engage in a conversation and, and see if you're comfortable and go back and forth. You know, guys come up and... how you doing? Right? You know, you know, exactly what's, what they're there for and what's going on whereas uh, you're in a bookstore and like, hey, I wanted to get that book. Was that, was that any good?

Speaker 2: Oh, my God. You wanna see me naked.

Speaker 1: Right. Yeah. See. So, the main things that you wanna do is make them feel comfortable, but also let them know that you're somewhat interested in spending some time one on one with them. Like, uh, coming up to someone and just being like, oh, hey, just wanted to let you know that you know, you, you have such a great smile and it's been fun seeing you here tonight.

All my buddies and I are in the back um, if you'd love to, we'd love to you know, talk to you at some point. And then, try to make her feel like there's no pressure. So, you're not all up in their grill trying to talk to them immediately.

Women are built on emotions and you need to make sure that they feels positive emotion and a bit of uh, not necessary push and pull, but, up and down like, oh, well is he gonna come up and talk to me now or is he just gonna go in the back. Uh, is he gonna come up and talk to me again? Agree? Disagree?

Speaker 2: I agree. I think it's all in the attitude when it comes to a guy hitting on a girl. Uh, or flirting in general because women have that kind of creepy, stalker vibe that we get from a lot of men.

Speaker 1: Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2: Uh, because they do. They come off over anxious.

Speaker 1: Because they don't know a lot of times.

Speaker 2: Yeah. And, and you are excited to talk to a girl that you are attracted to...

Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2: ... and then it comes off as almost desperation sometimes.

Speaker 1: Yep.

Speaker 2: Or on the other side that they're just a player. So, finding a way to strike a balance of being really authentic is a huge part of it. Uh, and pretending like you don't wanna sleep with them on the first night is a great way to really start a conversation that you'll actually...

Speaker 1: Yep.

Speaker 2: ... pay attention to.

Speaker 1: And let me give you a little thing here guys too. So many guys think they have to have the perfect thing to say or that they have to build their way up from here. If you come in, you're at the middle. They've already given you the benefit of the doubt. You've taken the balls to come up and talk to somebody.

Now, it's your job just to kind of keep it up. But, they're for the most part, they're gonna give you the benefit of the doubt if you come in with honest in-, intentions and, and, and uh, comfortable in your skin, they want you to succeed. They're hoping you succeed. So, get out there and try a little bit more.

Speaker 2: And one thing I have to add is that body language is so key...

Speaker 1: Oh, Absolutely.

Speaker 2: ... for guys to learn. So, if you do nothing else, study body language because it's like cheating at Black Jack. Uh, you can figure out what she's thinking about you without her saying anything. So, if she's...

Speaker 1: Yep.

Speaker 2: ... if she's leaning in, she's really paying attention to you and you know, legs are...

Speaker 1: Legs crossed in the direction of the person.

Speaker 2: Exactly. Her toes are pointed.

Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2: And then if you're touching a little bit. That's all signs that wow, like, she's really receptive to me flirting, but if she's leaning away and you know...

Speaker 1: Yeah. Don't, don't continue to...

Speaker 2: Please stop. It gets really awkward. So, learning their body language is a really great tool uh, if you're, you're single and dating or if just in any situation to make sure that you haven't really turned someone off.

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