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How to Deal with Romantic Rejection

Learn how to deal with romantic rejection in this Howcast video.

Transcript

Rachael DeAlto: Rejection sucks.

Hunt Ethridge: It does.

Rachael: Big time. But, it's a part of dating. It's a part of flirting. It's a part of life. You're going to get rejected by people for love interests. And you're going to get rejected for jobs. There's a lot of stuff that, kind of, you have to deal with. So.

Hunt: It's going to happen.

Rachael: Exactly. Let's be practical here. How do we deal with rejection? My advice is basically to just get back on the horse. Realize that they make mint chocolate chip and strawberry for a reason. That not everybody is meant for you, but there is somebody out there that is. So, if you're flirting with someone and they're like, not interested, it's so much better to get right back out there, and meet somebody else, and get that positive reinforcement...

Hunt: Yep.

Rachael: ...than to go into the corner and be like, 'Oh my gosh. They didn't like me. Why am I here? Why do I even bother? I quit dating.'

Rachael: And this is one of the things, too, that talk to my clients about - the mindset too. Because the word reject is such a strong word, too.

Rachael: It is.

Hunt: To reject something really you have to know it, understand it, balance it against something else, and then choose one thing. We use the word, 'I got rejected.' No, no you didn't. She doesn't know anything about you.

Rachael: Yes.

Hunt: He doesn't know anything about you. All it is is it's a nonstarter. I used to be an actor. And when I would go in and hear no on my auditions I used to think it's because...

Rachael: It's me.

Hunt: It's no to me. I'm not a good person. I'm not talented enough. I'm not smart enough. I'm not attractive enough. And the same thing when you go out and meet people. You realize, it isn't.

Rachael: No.

Hunt: They don't know you. They don't know all your great qualities. They don't know how funny you are. They don't know how smart you are. It's just not going, it's just two ships passing in the wind...

Rachael: Yeah.

Hunt: ...at that point.

Rachael: It's a little cliche. It's not about you. It's about them. It's their perception of you, which, honestly, you shouldn't care about. So, you can get rejected for so many different reasons. You could get rejected because they're in a relationship and they don't want to go outside of it. You could get rejected because your hair's the wrong color.

Hunt: You could get rejected because they didn't get a good night of sleep last night...

Rachael: Exactly...

Hunt: and they just don't want to talk to you.

Rachael: My God, don't talk to me after not a good night of sleep. But those are all these things that you can't know without actually getting inside their head. So, don't spend so much time getting inside your head. Get back out there. Get on the horse. Have some more positive connections, and you'll be surprised.

Hunt: Yep. If you go up and talk to somebody and it doesn't go well, what did you lose? You lost 15 seconds, that's it.

Rachael: Exactly.

Hunt: Everything else that you feel you lost is only in your head, so just change your mindset and get out there. It'll allow you to really go after what you want.

Rachael: Agreed.

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