Let go of anger in some basic, self-respecting ways that won't cause harm to anyone, including you.
- Step 1: Set a rule that you will find kind words to say and lend a helping hand instead of making critical remarks, no matter how bad you feel. It will be a while before you can find forgiveness, but it's a start in the right direction.
- FACT: A 2009 study identified angry or hostile people with already diagnosed heart disease as being 24 percent more likely than other heart patients to have poor prognoses.
- Step 2: Ask questions of others who have been through some hard times with their temper to learn how to cope. Open your mind to receive their advice and don't make assumptions about their incompetence. They might be a lot like you.
- Step 3: Decide what you're holding on to and what you get out of continuing to be angry. Spell out for yourself what obstacles -- fear of the unknown, guilt, control -- you have to overcome. You could be still fighting battles from childhood.
- Step 4: If you're angry at a person, feel empathy for them. Take stock for a moment to respect that they too have fears, weaknesses, and shame.
- TIP: You can be right and still not be happy.
- Step 5: Own your feelings after a divorce or breakup. You won't stop feeling angry just by pretending that you're not angry.